Wednesday, May 28, 2008

I LIVE IN DENIAL...I CAN MOVE AHEAD NOW!!!

I live in DENIAL!!!!! I am considered morbidly obese by most people, but how do I view myself? I really don't think about it much. I realize I am no size 2 but I really do not see myself as the 322 lb person I have become not until last year and decided to better my lifestyle and it hit me that I had gained all the weight over the years and I finally said enough is enough. The first time it really hit me was when I was shopping one day and I saw this reflection in a store window and I thought boy that woman is HUGE and I had to look back and said wait a minute and realized it was ME!!!! What an eye opener for me. Starting this journey has been the easiest and hardest decision of my life but it will have its rewards I just need to stay focused and strong and keep the goal and know that my future is bright and will be rewarded in the end. I have a great support system and my trainer is so supportive I could not ask for more. Thanks to everyone for posting you all are great inspirations for me (keep them coming). I will keep struggling and denial is a part of that I can move forward and nothing in life is simple but self worth is the best reward you can give yourself!!!! I can move ahead now knowing I can embrace my denial......

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Mara,

Found your blog from a BlogHer post. Congratulations on taking this step. I made the same choice about 18 months ago. Yes people will notice; yes you will sometimes feel like the old fat person and sometimes feel like a brand new person. If you get comfortable with the lifestyle (thank you for not saying your on a diet), it will become part of you.

RivkA with a capital A said...

I am not sure how I found your blog, but you are an impressive woman! I don't think I would have the courage to put my weight on my blog. I'm embarrassed at how the pounds have crept up on me.

Now I am struggling to change my eating habits. I would also like to change my lifestyle, but it is hard to get motivated.

I know that if I lose weight, many of my health problems will improve. But, thanks to my most serious health problem (cancer), I can't do many of the activities that I used to enjoy (like folk dancing)

For now, I have the simple goal of hoping to add "walking" to my weekly activities. It's not glamorous, but I think that if I find a partner, I can enjoy it. It is hard to find the time....

RedVelvet said...

Hey Mara,
It's Chrissy from KSC! Your doing a great job and i know you can reach your goal!! Keep up that determination and strength, it's what makes YOU shine among the rest!!!