Wednesday, December 31, 2008

End of Year in review!

Today marks the end of 2008 - and boy what a year it has been for me. Starting this journey back in May I had no idea what I could or would accomplish in the 8 mths I have also been on this blog. Through the ups and downs and all the goals I have made for myself I am going to have to admit I did quite well.

2008 will be marked down on my list as a year I made new friends, did things I never thought I would ever do and the most important one is becoming a healthly person inside and out. Many thanks to all of you for staying with me on this journey and to everyone in my life, you know who you are, for standing by me through it all.

I hope you all have a wonderful 2009 I know I will!

"We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give"
Winston Churchill

Monday, December 29, 2008

Weigh In - What?

Ok I am starting to believe no matter what I do I will never figure this weight loss out. I went to weigh in today and low and behold I lost 4 lbs! WHAT how is that possible - after not working out for almost a week and all the bad stuff (trust me all really bad) I ate how did this happen? I am just out of words.........

I have set some new goals for 2009

Loss 40 lbs
Play Softball in the Spring
More Rockclimbing
Take up Running (this is a HUGE one for me)
Work on my self esteem
White Water Rafting

I am sure there will be plenty more but for now these are the ones I want to work on. What are your goals for 2009?

Sunday, December 28, 2008

7 Miles and counting!

Today marks the day I walked 7 miles - BOY am I tired and I am having some trouble with my ankle today. I was lucky to walk with two of my friends who were there to support me - thanks guys! I was doing really well until mile 5 and then my legs were begging me to give up but I did not and I am really happy to say I feel great!

Next week I am back on my training - I so need it- today just proved to me how out of shape I am just from not going to the gym in almost a week lol! Monday I am going swimming Tuesday will probably be my off day Wednesday walk 3 miles Thursday walk 3 miles and Friday off day. I am refocused (yet again) and will reset some goals next week. Hope everyone had a wonderful holiday and you also get back on track like me.

Saturday, December 27, 2008

Falling off the Wagon!

I will admit it this week has been the hardest for in the last few months. All I have done for the past week is eat (I have not been to the gym since Tuesday the 23rd) and I cannot stop! I seem to be falling back into my old habit. Thinking about food 24 hrs a day - today is when I get back on my routine and do what I know is the best for me. I am going to say I probably am not going to make my goal for December (losing 5 lbs) and that also means not fulfilling my goal for the year. I am trying to keep my head high and know in my heart that this can happen but in the end I WILL get this back on track and I WILL meet my goal in January.

Hope everyone had a wonderful holiday (I did) my Son went home today so I am kind of sad but very blessed for the time we had together this week.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas everyone! I hope all of you are having a wonderful Christmas today and I am so thankful for all I have in my life.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Special Day!

Today my Son is arriving for Christmas and I am so excited. I miss him so much and I always look forward to when he comes for a visit.

Well this weeks work outs have not been going so well. I think I hurt my back at bodypump last week because all weekend it was really tuff to move around and when I went to Zumba it was so hard to get moving. And to be truthful I have not really been that motivated since being off from work. I really have to make myself get up and go to the gym. Today I probably will not work out and tomorrow I really need to walk my 7 miles (nope did not do it this weekend) so I have to get the cob webs out of my head and get off my fat *ss and do it! My Son made me promise to take him to work out so that will help me in so many ways. I hope all of you are keeping up with your routines and have not falling into the same rut.

Friday, December 19, 2008

This and That!

Happy Friday everyone! Today when I get off from work I am officially off for 1 week! Thank goodness I so need the rest.

Update on my rash - I finally dragged myself to the Doctor today and he told me I am having an allergic reaction to something (and also stress related) and that I need to take this pill and some "Magic" cream for 1 week and I will be all better - All I can say is thank goodness I was beginning to think I was going crazy (it was itching so much I thought my skin was going to come off ha). But all is well the meds seem to be working and I am on the road to recovery. I also weighed in again this week and I am still holding at 277 lbs. (darn that 5 lbs) so the next week I will be really staying focused on that.

Last night Dee and I went to bodypump and I had a blast! I miss going each week so I am going to find a way to incorporate it back into my routine. This weekend I am going back to Ab class and then walk 3 miles on Saturday and Sunday is 7 miles (at the park) then Monday is my off day but I think I might go swimming again.

There probably will not be a lot of post next week, my Son is coming, but I will try and post as much as I can and take some pics to share. Happy Weekend everyone!

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Red and icky!

Last night I went to the gym with every intention of doing the strive class but yesterday I developed a rash on my chest and arms so between the irritation of that and I was stressing over it I did not go. I am not really sure what is going on - one of my friends thinks I have stressed myself out so much in the last few weeks that I have developed the rash as a side effect. I have never had this before and I am not sure what to do. I really don' think I need to go to my Doctor for this but I am going to keep an eye on it and hopefully it will clear up - the first step is to stop being stressed (better said than done lol). Some of my stress is I have not been going to the gym as much and also I want to loss the 5 lbs I need to reach my goal by the end of the month so I am going to refocus once again and keep myself on the straight path.

Tonight I am going to Zumba and working out with my trainer so I am hoping as of this week I can get back to my routine and get back on track. The rest of the week is bodypump on Thursday, Friday off, Saturday is Ab class and Sunday is walking 7 miles. I am really looking forward to the walk and then next week my Son comes for the Holiday and he made me promise to take him to the gym and work out so off we will go (got to love him).

Any advice on my rash?

Monday, December 15, 2008

Weigh In - Good & Bad!

Today I went for my 2 week weigh in and I already knew I had not lost anything in the last few weeks, you can just tell, so I was holding my breath when I got on the scale and low and behold I have maintained the 277 lbs from over 2 weeks ago WOW! I just knew I had at least gained 5 lbs so I was so ready to get upset with myself. I am still not happy but at least I did not gain any weight and now I can focus on losing the 5lbs that is my goal for the end of the year (to be at 50 lbs total). I am really going to work hard at the gym this week and the next 2 and really work more on my eating habits the next few days (have been really bad - bad candy bad!)

Hope everyone is having a wonderful Monday!

Sunday, December 14, 2008

6 Miles and much more!

Yesterday Dee and I walked 6 miles - I felt really good last night but this morning my legs are HURTING so bad I think I might have to lay in bed all day lol! It really was a good walk and the park we go to is so nice and I just love being outside. Next week is 7 miles and counting - I will keep you guys posted (I will try and remember to take some pics).

Attached below is what you guys have been waiting for pics of me in my new jeans. Be kind I am still a little unsure (I love nutcrackers so that one is my favorite!).

Saturday, December 13, 2008

This and That!

Good morning all! This week has been so hectic and I have been slacking on my gym time. But this afternoon I am going to walk my 6 miles for the marathon at the lovely park I was at last week. The rest of the week should shape up to be back on track.

I went shopping on Friday and got a new pair of jeans (I did not like any other styles so I got the exact same pair I got before lol) and a beautiful white sweater. So my shopping days are not going that well - I went alone this time and boy does it make a difference - I was so critical about everything! But I think I made good choices and I am happy with what I got, but it also reminds me that I still have a LONG way to go for my goals.

In 2 weeks my son comes for Christmas so I will be tested once again on my food choices but I know that he supports anything I am doing so it should not be that hard - now if I can just keep everyone at work from bringing in all those wonderful chocolate treats I would be better off! Hope everyone has a wonderful weekend and I will post pics soon.

Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.
Winston Churchill

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Baggy vs Being Real

This morning when I was getting dressed for work I was reminded by a voice in my head (Dee and Cindy) telling me it is time to give up those baggy pants and be who you really are. In the last few weeks since losing so much weight a lot of my clothes are hanging off of me (and comments have been said). But this week it has really hit close to home. On Monday at the gym I was wearing my usual work clothes (baggy pants, shirt etc) and when I got redressed after swimming I noticed how BIG my pants really are and just what everyone keeps telling me - and this morning when I was getting dressed I had to keep pulling up my pants (most of my pants are nylon and elastic bands). My emotions right now are going crazy - I know this is great news but my baggy clothes are my security of who I am - Am I really ready to be the real person I am inside? Am I ready to give up my security blanket? It is always scary to me to try new things (but I do believe you at least have to try them once before saying no) and also knowing that I have to "dress" the way I need too (clothes that actually fit) I am scared out of my mind!

Last month I did buy some jeans and this week I am going to try and find another pair that I can live with and also try and wear them out and about so I can get comfortable with the new me. This transition is like all the others it is just something that has come and I need to get out there and show everyone who I really am and not be afraid of the outcome. But my insecurities are eating me alive – what other people see is not what I see. I still think of myself as that 322 lb person (pic to the right) and when I look in the mirror that is all I really notice. Self image is the toughest part – I am my worst enemy and I know it and I am trying to move past that but after all of these years of being obese and not caring it is really hard to let go of that part of yourself and let the real you out. But this week I am going to take a giant leap of faith and trust myself enough to emerge from my cocoon and be the beautiful butterfly I truly am. I keep being reminded by my Son “you are the strongest person I know” so I better prove it to him and stop keeping myself from being who I am.

I promise to take pics (I know I keep saying that but I will) and post them this weekend. Watch out everyone the new Mara is about to explode on the scene!

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."
- Theodor Seuss Geisel

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Oprah - 1 of my hero's!

What is there to say about Oprah, she is so much too so many but to me she is one of my Hero's. She is just so honest about her weight and her ups and downs. In the new issue of her magazine "O" ( she discusses her weight gain and how it has effected her in the last few months. Just like many of us she struggles with her weight and knows what causes it but has the same problems we all due.,,20245089,00.html

I think she looks great on the cover!

I love how she is always so honest and open about herself and shows that no matter whom you are you can "fall off the wagon" but you also can get right back up and be successful. I personally understand her statement of "feeling like a cow" because there are some days that is how I feel.

Cheers to you Oprah and know we are all behind you and thanks for keeping it real for all of us!

Monday, December 8, 2008

5 Miles and Counting!

Happy Monday everyone! Yesterday Dee and I worked on our Marathon training - since I have not been able to work on mine for over 2 weeks due to my surgery I was ready to jump in and walk my 4 miles for this week - there is this really nice park not far from where Dee lives so off we went.

I have to say this is a really nice park - the walk way is laid out with gravel instead of asphalt which to me makes it a more relaxing walk and the view was so beautiful; people walking their dogs, squirrels everywhere and really nice people walking on the path that actually spoke to us when we were walking by. Now Dee has a better stride than I do so she was well ahead of me which is fine with me as I really don't like to talk that much when I am trying to focus on my training (and luckily she is the same way). About an hour into the walk I was feeling really great and wondering just how far I actually had been walking (I was not really paying much mind because I was having such a great time) and Dee called me on my cell and said I am going around one more time and I am done - I asked her how many times do you go around the trail for 1 mile and she said once - I went WHAT that means I have walked 5 miles already (in 1 hour and 15 mins.)! Yep I went over my goal and did not even realize it! I am so excited - it just goes to show when you are focused on accomplishing something and you are really enjoying it you even surprise yourself with what you can do.

Today I am really feeling it but in a good way - I am just so proud to say I am back on track and ready to walk 10 miles in a couple of weeks (6 week training ends there - you never actually walk 13 miles before the marathon - you just keep walking 8 to 10 miles up until the walk) and I can feel confident in knowing that I can surpass my goals.

Sunday, December 7, 2008

All About Me!

Liz at, tagged me with a meme, here are the rules:

1) Link to your tagger and list all these rules in your blog.
2) Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird.
3) Tag 7 people at the end of your post by including links to their blogs.
4) Let them know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

This is hard but here we go:

1. I am a planner - my son makes fun of me because I know what I am going to be doing in the next 2 months! I have NEVER been a by the seat of your pants kind of person but I have been trying to live "outside" my box the last few months and I have to say I actually like it.

2. When I was in High School I joined shop to get close to someone I liked - yep that's right I was such a nerd - but it was worth it - it worked!

3. I like simple things in life - I am not really a Materialistic person - I like to take long walks, have picnics and I only like Vanilla Ice cream with whipped cream only (yep boring).

4. I am actually shy - a lot people don't know this. I really do not like to be the center of attention in anyway - over the last few months since losing a lot of my weight I have been approached (by mostly people I don't know) about how wonderful I look and I get so embarrassed (I know I should not but it is tuff for me). I am not the one you send out to be a spoke person (I am hoping this will change in the future) I usually am the one in the background.

5. I love to go mudding - I am from the South so mudding is something we do on the weekends - it is a lot of fun and you laugh so hard you wet yourself lol!

6. I was a tom boy - many people are surprised to find out what a HUGE tom boy I was when I was younger - I used to fish, hunt, climb trees etc. you name it I probably was doing it - and the boys were so jealous especially when I did it better than them ha!

7. I HATE working out - I know I have posted this on my blog before but it so 100% true. It is such a chore to me but in the end if I don't do it I feel terrible - it is growing on me - but I like classes like Zumba, bodypump and working on the marathon - I like to be active when I like something (we are all like that right?).

Well I hope this was not to boring for everyone, thanks to Liz for tagging me. Listed below is who I think are worthy (some new folks who are rocking their goals!):

Kym at
Cynthia at
Miche at
Dee at
Kimberly at
Jen at
Tamzin at

Good luck everyone it is harder than you think!

Friday, December 5, 2008

Christmas Lights!

Tonight I am going with my friend Dee to see the Christmas lights downtown so I am really excited. I love Christmas it is just the "most wonderful time of year"! Since moving up North last year I have experienced a lot of things that are not traditions in the South and I am just looking forward to spending time with my Friends.

Last night I did go to the gym - thank you guys for all the encouraging words it really does help. I walked 2.5 miles and this weekend I am back on track for my training for the Marathon (going to walk 4 miles) and then a rest day on Monday (yeah). The gym will be waxing the floors next week so no Zumba, Ab class, Bodypump or any activities in the workout room so I am going to focus on my walking and maybe take another Strive class.

Happy weekend everyone!

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Tired and Lazy!

Last night I did not go to Zumba or work out with my trainer - I have been feeling really tired lately and I am not really sure if it is due to the surgery I had a couple of weeks ago or just so much going on in my life right now I am just run down and my energy level is zero. I kind of feel bad for not going to the gym since working out does make me feel a lot better in the long run but I am trying not to think about it.

Do you ever have those days that you are so tired that all you can think of is going to bed and nothing else?

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Zumba anyone!

Tonight is the first time I am going to be taking Zumba since my surgery over 3 weeks ago. I am ready! I have actually missed it and I am looking forward to getting my groove back on ha! I also work out with my trainer tonight (working on marathon) and then a much needed rest.

This weekend I also get back into my marathon training (I was able to walk 4 miles before the surgery so I am going to try that again on Saturday) and I cannot wait. It is a little cold here but I am sure after a few minutes of walking I want even notice lol. I am ready everyone and looking forward to what is next on my list!

Continuous effort - not strength or intelligence - is the key to unlocking our potential.
Winston Churchill

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

7 Months and Counting

December 3rd will mark 7 months when I started this journey. I went back on this blog and started reading my first entries and the one that really hits me hard is the very first one on May 17th , After re reading this post I have a new insight to myself - reading how I felt when I started this journey and what goals I had set for myself is such a reminder of how far I have come. When I originally set these goals I never would have guessed that I would be so lucky to actually be able to post as of this date that I have achieved more than I ever would have imagined. This blog holds me accountable for all my actions as well as it keeps me on track and lets me keep up with all the people who have inspired me - So today I would like to say a special thank you to them:

Lynn Haraldson-Bering at - she inspired me to become the person I really am inside - Thanks Lynn!

My Mom - she is with me through every tear and happy moment.

My Son - he is my heart and he always knows how to make me smile!

Donna my Trainer - she is my true motivation and stands behind me through it all.

Dee - My new friend she listens to me even when I whine and supports me along the way.

Cindy, Carmella, Barbara and all my other friends - thanks for keeping me real.

To all my fellow bloggers - without all of you I would not be where I am today.

Thanks everyone - it is nice to be reminded of what you have accomplished but also of what Lies ahead.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Weigh In-Wow!

Last week was actually my weigh in day and due to the holiday I decided to skip it. Much to my surprise I lost 7 lbs! WOW!!!!!! To date I have lost 45 lbs. I just cannot believe it - I bet if I had weighed before Thanksgiving it probably would have been 10 lbs! But I will take what I can get. I have officially met my goal for November of losing 40 lbs so now I am on my mission to loss 5 lbs by the end of December and that will bring my total to 50 lbs and make my year. I am so proud of me!

It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves.
~Edmund Hillary

A new class

On Saturday morning Dee asked me to join her in the Abs class she has been taking so off we went. First of all I was so terrified - I have heard so much about this class - as in the first 30 mins. you are on the floor and your butt the whole time and that you have to hold yourself up with your arms and how it is so intense. I went in with an open mind because the gentleman that teaches the class looks great (trust me he has great Abs!). Dee and I set up in the back as usual (I don't want to be the center of attention on my first try ha), As promised we started on the mat on the floor doing a lot of stretches (which I love one of my goals is to be able to touch my toes standing or sitting down) and proceeded to do a lot of sit ups (100 of them) well I only did 40 which I was very surprised to say I really could do - we then moved on to some other exercises that I don't know the name of but you are on your butt the whole time lifting your legs off the floor and moving back and forth then on to some others that you have to lean on your side and lift your legs off the floor. During the course of the class I was getting a headache (did I stress myself out - probably) but I proceeded to continue with the class as I was determined to complete it no matter what.

After 30 mins. we started doing some exercise I know squats, stretches etc. and I was really glad the class lasted only 45 mins. The instructor Michael (he makes it look so easy lol) is so good he knows what he is doing and lets you know that if you can not accomplish the exact exercise that you have alternatives which I really needed. When we reached the last 5 mins. I was really glad we ended with more stretching and relaxing before ending the class. As I was putting away my mat Michael approached me and gave me a hug and said You did a really good job for your 1st time – wow was he really just being nice or did I do a good job – It just felt good to be reminded that even when you cannot accomplish something 100% you are rewarded in some way for at least trying.

The lesson I learned if you want great Abs you really have to work hard for it.