Thursday, July 30, 2009


Well I thought I was starting to feel better but over the last few days I have developed a rash near my surgery site (had surgery over a month ago) and let me just say OUCH! At first I thought something might have bitten me but nope the Doc said since I have been sweating so much it has gotten infected... What? Who knew doing something productive could harm you. Well this sets me back some more but I have to listen to my body or I want be able to move forward. Take care everyone I will be back when this is over - soon very soon!

Monday, July 27, 2009

Feeling Better

Happy Monday everyone. Well I finally broke down and went to the Doc on Friday (yep I did a weight in) and I officially have a UTI. That explains why I have been feeling so down and tired. But the good news is I only gained 3 pounds over the last few weeks - what a relief I was terrified to step on the scale and was glad what it said.

On a good note tonight is Zumba and I might go back to kickboxing on Wednesday we will see how I feel.

Friday, July 24, 2009

Trying to Hard

Last night I was working on some paperwork for work and I was thinking about how I am trying so hard to fit everything I have to do into my life and how much is not getting done. The gym is what I noticed suffers the most (imagine) and since my ankle has been giving my fits again I so do not want to do anything. But the hardest part is just getting up and doing it and finding that niche that will inspire me along the way. On this journey I never thought getting up and going to the gym would become such a hard thing. But as many people do we get into a routine and we find ourselves right back where we started and trying to justify it to ourselves that it will be ok. It is not ok that I am no longer losing weight and that I am not doing anything about it.

The hardest thing I am looking at now is just being able to look in the mirror and tell myself you are fine you are on tract knowing I am lying to myself. Bad habits can so get me in trouble. I have gotten back into the habit of having a donut everyday. Ok yes I know I should pass buttttttttttt................this means I am making my eating habits hard also which I should just say no and do what I know is right.

If you had to name one hard thing for you on your journey what would it be and what are doing to make it easier?

Happy weekend everyone!

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

16 ways to get Motivated

I found this great article on motivation when you are in a slump take a peek:

Monday, July 20, 2009

My goal

Happy Monday everyone I hope you all had a great weekend I did! The beach was such a relaxing place to go this weekend and I really got to think about what direction my life is going in and what I need to do to keep it on track.

I have been a slacker the past few weeks (months) and I am hoping to make a difference this week. I am going to the gym on Tuesday and Wednesday is kickboxing. My goal this week is to just get back at it and don't give up. I saw some of my friends that I know at the beach (they have not seen me since March) and they just went on and on about how much I have lost. I just smiled and said thank you as I know that is so not true! They only see me about every 3 months so to them I have gotten smaller. It was just nice to hear it!

Friday, July 17, 2009

That Old Guilty Feeling

This whole week I have been having that old guilty feeling come across me each day every time I eat. I know this is something that is always in the back of my mind but since I have been on the down low lately it really is hitting me hard. This struggle is going to last longer than most I think since my motivation in the last few months is at the low point and just keeping myself positive is the next struggle. I never thought I would be back at this situation and I never thought I would pass up the gym for food again!

This weekend I am off to the beach (probably somewhere I don't need to be) to see some friends and hopefully do some walking on the beach as well (I love that) and just clear the cobwebs out of my head and just look at the positive side of what is going on right now. Hope everyone has a great weekend!

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Down the wrong path AGAIN!

I have been out of it for the past few days so no gym time nothing. I feel as if I am going down that path of just not caring anymore I am just so tired and no motivation in sight. I know I am up and down everyday but I really just don't care that much right now if I go to the gym or do anything but sleep. I am falling down the same path I once lead with no stopping................I so need to get up and just do it! No more excuses try and remember what my goals are and refocus (a word I use a lot) and keep moving forward.

I am going to try and find my motivation again not sure where it went but she has to be somewhere!

Monday, July 13, 2009

Not so much

This weekend so not productive. A lot was going on so not much gym time/walking etc. I really need to just kick myself in the *ss and do it and also learn to say no when someone ask me to do something other than what is for me. That is life we just go with the flow lol!

Hope everyone had a wonderful weekend and got some exercise in - you all inspire me!

Friday, July 10, 2009

Positive people

Yesterday I spent some time with one of my favorite people she knows me pretty well and always can make me smile. Do you have that one person in your life that can do that for you no matter what? I mentioned last month about moving to a new location for my job and what I was going to do. Well that fell through and now I am on the verge of unemployment (she did not want me to leave) so now I am stressed out really bad and just hoping I can find new employment. As you all know stress is one of my problems along with many others that get me in a lot of trouble. But I find that having positive people in my life like my friend really does help. She is just so sweet and really knows how to show me that yes I am losing one thing but what I can gain is so much more. When you have people like that in your life what do you really have to complain about!

This weekend I am going for a hike then kickboxing on Sunday I will let you guys know how it goes! Happy weekend everyone!

"A friend is one who believes in you when you have ceased to believe in yourself."
- Sent by Lysha

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Patience and Coordination

Last night I went to the kickboxing class offered on Wednesday nights at the gym. Just so it is noted I have not been to kickboxing in about a month so I was scared about how well I actually could do. We started off with the jump rope exercise (15 mins of different speeds) because of my ankle I am allowed to do what I can (told by instructor do what you can as long as you are moving that is what counts - I like him) after that we moved on to partnering up (one with mitts and one with gloves) and work on the punching exercise then we moved on to kicking (and since I am not coordinated you can feel for my partner). Boy let me just say how old I feel today ha! I left shaking (happens sometimes after working out) and then getting home starving and ready to relax. In all it was a good hour spent and I really appreciate everyone in the class being patient with me since I have not been in such s long time and remembering some of the steps is hard (it is amazing what you can forget in such a short time). Tonight I am off from the gym but tomorrow the gym is offering a new class called Line Dancing let's just say I am very intrigued!

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

My companion

Last night I was determined to go for a walk so after a few hours I finally laced up my shoes and took my sweet dog for a walk. I find if I take him with me I work so much harder. He loves the outdoors and every time he sees me getting ready for the gym he thinks we are going for a walk. I think having a furry companion is just as good as having a friend come along after all aren't our animals our friends too?

Tonight I had plans to meet friends for dinner but that was cancelled so I think I am going to kick boxing tonight yeah!

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Oh Boy!

Well it happen I made it back to the gym last night I know I know hold your applause please! I went to the Zumba class last night and thank god it was only for 45 mins. I thought I was going to die in the first 5 mins. Just goes to show when you don't keep up with your program that you will pay for it later.

But really I do feel good today a little sore but worth it. Tonight I am hoping to go for a nice walk (my ankle of course is acting up ughhh). I was talking with Dee last night and she is having the same struggles as I am and we both agreed we have been lazy but that we are going to work on it as best we can. I just hope I can keep this up and really start showing something on the scale but that will come in due time. Happy Tuesday everyone!

Monday, July 6, 2009

Gym time

I hope everyone had a great weekend I did!

Today marks the day I am make at the gym (this time is for real) this weekend I noticed some of clothes are starting to fit to well (lol) I know this is my fault and I am just going to take small steps and get back to it! I really need this to keep my stress level down as well and just watch my eating and also to just feel good again. I have noticed over the past few months that I starting to feel tired a lot more and just no energy at all. I hate this feeling and I want to get back at what I know is best for me and I know I can DO IT!

This weekend should shape up well Monday Zumba, Tuesday walk or treadmill, Wednesday ???, Thursday off and Friday walking...this is my plan I hope to at least make most of it work!

Friday, July 3, 2009

Happy 4th!

I hope you all have a safe and wonderful day...

This weekend I am off to enjoy fireworks, time with friends and being happy that I live in such a wonderful country. Happy 4th everyone!

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Expecting to much from others

Are there times you are disappointed in someone? In the last few weeks I have been promised certain things and yesterday the rug was pulled out from under me. Needless to say it is no sitting well with me. Do I expect too much from people? I know I do from myself and expressed on this blog over and over I get really disappointed in myself when I don't reach my goals. But sometimes I know I over think things and could also find that to want too much. I am just upset with myself for trusting someone and getting the shaft. I know this is off topic but I am just upset! Thanks for listening.