I was reading the fitness tip of the day (at the right of my blog at the top); "Ultimately, I am what I choose to be; my self-esteem follows the same path." -Anonymous
BOY does this hit home for me - as posted as one of my 2009 goals I am working on my self-esteem and I am finding it quite the struggle. It seems to be a lot harder than being on my weight loss journey and a lot tougher than I every expected it would be.
Many people don't believe how shy and insecure I really am. A lot of people I know always say you are so confident; you are such an inspiration etc. If many of them really knew that I was just "playing" the role they would be shocked. When I gained that 322 lbs my self-esteem really went down and now that I have been on my way down on the scale I am finding it hard to receive the compliments and also see myself as everyone else does. I have this problem when people tell me how "hot" I look or how I have changed so much from the weight loss I just say stuff like - thanks but I am not happy or I don't see it or my favorite I have so much more to do and That is not what I see. And it is true - I still see myself as the 322 lb person that I have been for so long. Don't get me wrong I do notice some changes (bra size, losing a shoe size and pants size etc) but what I ultimately want to see I guess I am becoming inpatient. I need to really work on my self-esteem and enjoy who I am and not be so hard on myself (as I have posted before I am my worst enemy) and just enjoy this time in my life. I have accomplished so much and I have changed - I am a new person inside and out and I should be shouting it from the roof top that I am a different person than I was 8 months ago. This battle is going to be a hard one for me - my trainer has commented before about that (I get embarrassed if I have to do something in front of a group of people) that if I was alone in the gym I could accomplish so much more - and she is 100% right! I am to busy worrying about what everyone else is thinking instead of what I know I can do.
What do you guys do to improve your self-esteem?
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