How old am I??????

This weekend I went shopping to add some new tops to my wardrobe but what a disappointment it was. First off I still have to shop in the plus size stores (hopefully not for long) which are ok, for now, but I have to say my eyes were really opened this weekend on just what is available to me. Like most women my age I would like to dress like I have some sort of style but I felt that I was not given the same variety as you see in the misses’ dept or even the career woman's. My Mother went with me (she is 62) and her first response to me was I would not even wear this stuff. Most of the clothes I saw are made for women who are older (no offence grandma) which is fine for them but what about me? It just made me realize just how much hard work I have ahead of me so I can get into the clothes that I want to wear and that means getting into sizes that are under a size 16. I mean come on who wants to look like they are in some kind of tent and why do all the t shirts show my arms - anyone knows that a women who is overweight usually does not like to show their arms. (I am not ready yet). I have to admit that some of the shirts where ok but showing too much skin is something else I cannot understand. I guess there are some overweight women who are ok showing off their bodies and their size but I am just not one of them. Sometimes I feel like a second class citizen just because I am not a size 2 and that we are not entitled to look good or even have some type of choices given to us as they do for anyone who is overweight. Between the prints, the shirts not being long enough (to cover my huge stomach) to the strips that are horizontal (big girls should not wear these they only make us look bigger!). I ended up not buying anything which was a huge disappointed - but it did gave me the courage to move forward on my journey.




How do you feel about this and what alternatives do you find?

I liked it..!

I survived! The BODYPUMP class - it was so awesome and I think I was nervous for nothing. In all I learned a lot about myself as well as what I can do to tone this body. My trainer Donna set me up with some ladies in the room so I would not be alone (thank goodness) and they were so helpful and understanding showing me all the little "tricks" of being a first timer. I am still a little confused but I am sure over time it will get easier and then I will laugh at myself for over analyzing it (I do that a lot it is a fault I have). But in all it was a great experience and I am glad I did it - I will be going back! I encourage all of you to challenge yourself and don't set limits just go out there and do it! See what you can do - you might surprise yourself.

A BIG shout out to Donna (my trainer) thanks for always encouraging me and believing I can do something even when I don't and thanks for not only training me but becoming a friend (and putting up with my whining ha - god bless her).

Accountability

One of my favorite bloggers Zandria posted a wonderful topic about Accoutability and I wanted to share it with you....

6 Ways to Hold Yourself Accountable to a Fitness Routine by Zandria you can go to her link here..........
http://www.zandria.us/archives/main/2008/07/23/6-ways-to-hold-yourself-accountable-to-a-fitness-routine/

Let me know what you think and what you do to be accountable.

Scale is a bad word!

I did something I never do yesterday I weighed myself and yes I know I said I NEVER do this but I was feeling really good about myself and felt I had been working so hard that I could use some more good news. Imagine my surprise when the numbers came up and it was not good news - I gained 4 lbs! Needless to say I have been in a funk ever since I saw those numbers on the scale. How can this be? What has changed? Those are really great questions and when I spoke with my trainer (thank god she puts up with me) she said I need to think about what could have been different in the last few weeks than others and what I might need to change to get back on track. So not only do I have to start the BODYPUMP class tomorrow (still nervous about it) I now have to work on losing the 4 lbs I regained plus the 2 lbs that I am on goal for each week - I just need to refocus and not let this get me down - face the truth and reset goals and go for it! My son always tells me I am the strongest person he knows - I guess I better prove it!

Have any of you ever experienced this and what did you do?

Up for the challenge?

I have been challenged by my trainer to start something new in my workouts this week. She wants me to take a "BodyPump" (a brief description: The pre-choreographed simple weight work out! Designed to meet the strength training needs of everyone in the gym from beginner to expert! Sign up at the front desk to reserve your spot. All fitness levels.) class at my gym. I have to be honest I am so SCARED!!! I have never taken any kind of class at a gym and I also have seen the people who take this class and let me just tell you they are so good at it I am going to be like a fish out of water. Thank God I have Donna (my trainer) to support and guide me without her I don't think I would have the courage to do this.



I sign up for the class on Thursday the 24th and hopefully I will not make a complete fool out of myself on my first day but I have high hopes that I want! I will keep you guys posted and I will take some pics to post on the blog next week. Keep me in your thoughts - I am sure going to need them.

Sweat and I am going bananas....

This week I have increased my cardio per my trainer to help me keep on track for losing more weight to meet my goal. I have learned so much from starting this journey and I never knew that when you are doing cardio if you increase and decrease your heart rate that you sweat more and that means you are burning more calories. Boy I must be stupid. How simple is that and it so makes since. It is funny how the little things can open your eyes to so much. Since I do NOT like to sweat this has been really hard for me. But I know in the end that it will be well worth the pain. As Mom always tells me no pain no gain and she is so right!



A couple of years ago I had the most horrible acid reflux that it prevented me from eating foods that I enjoyed one of them being bananas. Well to my surprise I tried a banana last week and I was able to enjoy it and not have to pay for it later (if you have acid reflux you know what I am talking about). So I am back in love with bananas and so happy about it. Again it just proves working out and exercising and changing the way I eat has given me back so many things I never thought I could enjoy.



Keep sweating and enjoy the things you love!

Did I really choose this way of life...What I choose now!

Over the last few days I have been pondering if I really chose to live my life for the last 20 years as a morbidly obese person. The only response I can come up with is no. Over the past 20 years I have focused on raising my family and not really myself. When I turned 40 last year I decided it was going to be all about me no matter what and I would do whatever I had to and achieve my goals. One of the many things I have noticed since starting this journey is my attitude and how it has changed. I really take a look at myself everyday (in the past I did not care) and really focus on my appearance and how I view myself and I also take the time to plan my day according to my exercise routine and meals for the day. It is still surprising to me how life can change in such a short period of time. I would have never thought twice about doing anything other than working and getting things done for my family. Being morbidly obese for so long was not something I had planned when I was younger I had dreams and goals that never got fulfilled. But I do not believe in regret I believe in setting new goals and doing whatever you need to do to accomplish them.

Other things I have noticed since I have lost some weight (mostly in my face) that people are taking notice. I am asked all the time what have you been doing to yourself you look great -but since I am not used to all the positive comments it is still hard for me not to think of myself other than the obese person I have been all these years - I am working on it! I am so used to not being recognized when I am in the room, our someone holding the door open for me since I am not the pretty girl (skinny hot girls) or being invited anywhere because they are embarrassed to have the fat girl around (I have actually been told that to my face) - when someone notices something I am shocked and not really sure how to respond. I am working on taking the compliments and making them a positive one for me and just saying thank you for noticing and just getting used to the idea of being "normal" (if that is what you call not being fat).

Being fat in this time and age is considered being an outsider. Our society makes it hard for anyone who is obese to be scene as anything other than that. It saddens me to know that many people will not get to know me because all they see is a fat girl. I have been mooed (like a cow) at from strangers - do they think just because I am fat that I must be deaf! I do not understand how society can let people judge you in this way or even treat people as they choose. So the next time you are out and see someone that is obese don't judge them for that reason (we really should not judge anyone) look inside their eyes and you might be surprised by what you see (I am not trying to preach on this subject it is just close to my heart and felt I needed to share).

I have chosen a new path in my life and I choose to achieve that goal by this time next year with all the love and support from my friends (new ones included) and family I know my journey will be the best it can be and I will succeed!

What has been your experience with being obese?

Thank the Greek Gods...........

Greek Gods do exist and this proves it. I have found something new thanks to one of my favorite sites by Lynne (http://www.freewebs.com/lynnsjourney/)
she was telling everyone over at her blog about Greek Yogurt. I have never heard of this product but I am up for trying new things since I changed my eating habits and this just sounded too good to pass up trying out. I was in Wal-Mart shopping and was thinking I would go by the yogurt section just to see if they carry anything like this not sure I would even be able to find it. And low and behold right there in front of my eyes was Oikos Organic Greek Yogurt (http://www.oikosorganic.com/recipes/ go to the website and check out all the great recipes listed on the site). All I can say is this stuff is amazing and so addicting! I added some granola to mine and I have to say I am in heaven! I was also thinking of adding some fruit I bet it will be like eating ice cream (boy do I miss ice cream). I really think if you give it a try you will like it the creaminess and the taste is a lot better than yogurt (that is my opinion) and should not be passed up. If you guys are up for something new give it a taste and I don't think you will be disappointed. Thanks Lynne for sharing!

My new best friend at the gym.....

Last week my trainer had me try out a new machine to give me some variety because I was becoming bored with just doing the tread mill everyday and I was up for the challenge and I went into it with my eyes wide open. Well as of this week I LOVE THIS MACHINE! (below is a brief description of the machine and what it does for you in your workouts).


The Elliptical machines are a slight variation from the cross country machines made popular in the 1980s. They are available for residential or fitness club use.The machines appear to provide a safe, low-impact, aerobic workout.Elliptical machines deliver various combinations of workouts. Most models simulate walking (forward and backward), stepping, cycling and skiing using an elliptical motion with low or no impact. However, the term "elliptical machine" is broad and general. Not all machines are cross trainers, and not all offer a full-body workout. While manufacturers may claim that ellipticals can replace other machines, fitness experts recommend ellipticals as an addition to your existing program. Elliptical machines are ideal for people who want a low-impact indoor exercise, who want to vary their program, who are getting bored with their usual routine, who want a cardiovascular and full-body workout simultaneously, and who want to burn lots of calories in the shortest amount of time.


I have to say it is now my new best friend! It really is whipping my **s into shape. I am so sore after each workout but also feel like I actually accomplished something at the gym that day. Right now I do 10 mins. on the elliptical and 30 mins. on the tread mill. The goal is just do the elliptical machine but according to my trainer I have to work myself into it. I have to say it really leaves my legs very shaky but well worth it. I have attached a new pic of me working on the elliptical to let you guys know I am still working toward my goal. Donna, my trainer let me know tonight that as of next week my training sessions will be getting more intense (boy I am really scared I am not sure what that means). So I will keep you guys posted on my progress and I will be taking some pics to share with you guys.

Habits and Staying Positive

How do you change a habit? Hmmm this is one of those questions I ask myself everyday but I have put together a few ideas that have worked for me:

1. If you are trying to change a negative habit (say smoking, over eating) try replacing it with a positive one; exercising, join a book club - doing this will change your whole focus.

2. Make a 10 day challenge to yourself - Making this a habit every day (at the same time everyday) for 10 days will make a HUGE difference on the way you focus and it will become much easier. I find if I set smaller goals that I am able to meet them and then move forward to another one and challenge myself even more.

3. Commit commit commit! Love this word...if only we could do this but if you do this you will be surprised at the results.

4. Reward yourself - Rewarding yourself is ok but make them ones that will keep you motivated.

5. Urges (I hate them) - the temptation and the thought of it makes me want to scream sometimes but I find if I focus on something positive the urge will vanish.

6. Report and track your progress - starting this blog has made me more accountable about everything I do. And I feel it has made quite a difference in the way I focus and feel about everything. It can be very motivating to see just how far you have come.

7. The most important one is STAY POSITIVE!! - This is the one I have so much trouble with but with each passing day I feel more positive about everything. Saying I can do this instead of I can't does make you feel like you can do anything and the more you say it the more you get motivated. Negative thoughts can make you fail but positive ones can make you a winner and you will succeed. (Thanks to all my supporters (you know who you are) without you I would be lost).

I hope these habits are as helpful to you as they are to me. Just remember I am just like you - your story is my story and we are all in this together.

Another goal down.........

Well tonight was the night I had the new measurements done see the results below:

Initial Assessments
.............................5/3/08 ...............7/2/08.....................Change
Scale Weight ...........322 ....................308 ........................14 lbs
% Body Fat ..............41% ..................39.5% ...................-1.5 %
Tricep ......................43 .....................36
Iliac ..........................41 ...................37
Thigh .......................52 .....................48
Neck ........................19.25 ..................19 ..........................-.25
Shoulders ................53.5 ......................51.5 ........................-2.0
Chest .......................54 .......................53 ...........................-1
Upper Arm ...............18 ......................17.25 ......................-.75
Lower Arm ...............13 .......................13
Waist .......................57 ......................55 ...........................-2.0
Hips ........................63 ......................61 ...........................-2.0
Thigh .......................29 ......................28.75 .....................-25
Calf .........................23.5 ....................23 ..........................-.5

I am so surprised at all the progress I have made in such a short time. All the hard work aches and pains are truly worth it. I am really proud of myself right now and have a new drive to do more. Thanks to Donna my trainer for inspiring me to keep going on my journey - without her I would not be where I am today and I am so grateful. To anyone who is thinking of getting a trainer I 100% agree! Just do it - or work out with a friend or buddy and you will be glad you did. I know I am it has truly been worth it and I can say I am well on my way to the new me!